I Won the Lotto

I Won the Lotto!

Friday morning I went across the street from work to get a soda. While I waited to check out I saw the Lotto Machine with a sign on it saying, "Jackpot $4,000,000!" I rarely buy Lotto tickets but I thought, "What the heck?" I bought a "Quick Pick" and put it in my wallet.

This morning, Sunday morning, I turned on the radio to hear the news. I was still in bed and in a kind of twilight sleep and heard the announcer say the Lotto numbers. I didn't actually hear the numbers, I just heard him say some numbers. Then I remembered that I had a ticket. I knew I didn't have the winning ticket, even though I didn't even know the numbers I had.

I got up a half an hour later and went to the bathroom. As I sat on the toilet (that's where I do my best thinking), I remembered the ticket. I thought about how cool it would be if I won, especially since I am losing my job. I was thinking about how I would share it with family and friends. Then I thought about breakfast and forgot about the ticket again.

I had a fried egg sandwich on wheat bread with just a little mayo. It was soo good. I make the best fried egg sandwich in the world, if I must say so myself. Then I sat down to watch the morning political shows.

I watched the McLaughlin Group that my Tivo recorded last night. And then I watched Tim Russert (Meet the Press) and Chris Matthews. It seems we have another liar in the Administration named Alberto Gonzales. The Attorney General, the chief law enforcement officer in the federal government, is a liar!

Anyway, I sat down at my computer to write a blog about the A.G. and remembered the Lotto ticket. I went on the Lotto web site to get the numbers. Once there I went to my wallet and got the ticket. I compared the ticket to the screen. That's one... two... three... four... five... six! OH MY GOD! No wait. I looked again and again.

I WON!

I won. I Won. I don't believe it. I wonder if I will have to split it with someone? How much will I get if I take it all now? How much will the taxes be? It should be about $1,600,000! I don't believe it. And you shouldn't either! April fools.

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